Fandom: !Fanfiction, Glee
Personaggi: Leo, Blaine
Genere: Introspettivo
Avvisi: Gen, Future!Fic
Rating: PG-13
Note: This story is set way after another one which is not even written yet, but it deals with parallel universes and unviersal constants. Something like that. It really doesn't matter.
Prompt: Written for the Phade team during the Cow-t #3 @ maridichallenge (Mission 2: Skirt) and for 500 themes (theme 488: When the words collide).

Riassunto: Blaine wakes up to find a woman in the kitchen. She looks like Leo, but she's not, and this can only mean one thing: somewhere, somehow two universes have collided. Again.

The existence of different universes where they were different people doing different things or where things between them had gone in a very different way has been a really difficult concept to grasp, especially for Blaine who's very young at heart but not exactly an enthusiast of parallel universes and sci-fi in general. Leo had to explain him all the theories and make him see all the movies and series he could think of before Blaine could even start to understand what had happened to them during the most confusing period of their life. At the end he had understood some of it – especially that it was over for good – and he was proud of himself.

So when everything goes nuts again, he's more frustrated than he's worried.

Yesterday has been a very long working day, followed by a very troubled night. The awful weather – thunders, lightening, rain for ten hours straight – has given him problems sleeping and he wakes up way later than usual, which always puts him in a bad mood, only to find a girl in his kitchen.

“Excuse me?” He frowns, watching her put some slices of bread in the toaster and move around his cabinet like she knew where everything is. “Who the hell are you?”

“What do you mean who the hell am I?”

For one lost moment, Blaine thinks Leo is in drag. Her face, the straight line of his nose, her plump lips are Leo's. Even the way she tilts her head and curls her nose to show confusion are the same. But her curly black hair is a little longer than his boyfriend's and where Leo is flat, she's obviously not.
Sure, Leo could have wore a wig and stuffed a bra, but when Blaine looks closely, he notices that the features of this girl are more delicate than Leo's, she has a waistline and the general way she moves is too feminine for Leo to be mimicking it. That's a real girl.

“Leo?” He asks, tentatively.

She looks amused, and chuckles. “You mean Lea,” she says, and he's literally plunged into desperation at those three simple words. “You must be really tired if you don't even recognize me.”

“I don't understand.”

“I know. That's what always happens when you work too much, come back late and probably drink too,” she goes on as she resumes toasting bread. “You wake up all confused. Come on, sit down. I made you breakfast.”

Blaine sits down only because standing up is too much to bear for him right now. He can't look away from her boobs for the only reason that they are there and they shouldn't be. “How did you get in?”

She puts the slices of bread on a plate, whistling some kind of silly tune. “You gave me the keys last month, remember? When you went to New York and you said I could use your apartment to study?”

Obviously, nothing even remotely close to that has ever happened in general, let alone in the past month. Last time he went to New York was six months ago and Leo stopped studying when he had the breakdown and never resumed again. This is enough to confirm that the universe screwed something up again, if the fact that his boyfriend is a girl weren't enough. Now it is a matter of understanding if he moved to her reality or the other way around. But since the house is the one he bought in Lima, then she must be the one out of place.

“What was wrong with your apartment?” He asks, feeling calmer than the thought he would be knowing that the whole world could be in danger again. The fact is that he knows that talking nonsense and insisting on facts that only happened in his reality won't get him anywhere, so the best thing to do is try to understand what her reality is and how she fucking got here. “Why didn't you go there?”

“Because,” she brings him his coffee, for which he's grateful, “I don't have one after Harper moved out to be a star in Brooklyn. But studying at home is not an option. Tana makes too much noise.”

The fact that at some point of her life Lea has lived with Harper almost makes him laugh, especially knowing that his Leo would never do such a thing. He loves Harper in some twisted hating way and the other way around but those two can't occupy the same space for more than two hours without screaming at each other. He would love to meet Lea's Harper and see what kind of girl she is. “So,” he says, tentatively, “did she have a breakthrough?”

“Not yet.” Lea shakes her head as she sips her coffee, leaning on the counter. She shows her cleavage directly at him and Blaine starts to wonder if she's doing that on purpose. If he thinks about it, that's something Leo would do if he had boobs. After all, his adoration for that part of the female anatomy can be almost embarrassing, sometimes. “But she has an audition with that producer you told her next week, so fingers crossed.”

Blaine mimics her gesture and smiles. “I really hope she makes it,” he says, and he's sincere. Harper is very talented and she wants to be a star so much that she deserves it.

“Me too,” she tilts her head to the side and shrugs. She looks so much like Leo that it's almost disturbing. He has nothing against people in drag or people who change sex, but this is different. It's waking up one morning and finds out your life-time male partner doesn't have a cock anymore. “God forbid she won't make it. I don't wanna spend the next six months restraining the flood of her tears if she doesn't.”

Blaine chuckles. This is so Leo too. Then something strikes him and he tries to sound casual when he asks, “Where are the kids?” He's aware that not knowing where his children are is weird, but he's ready to play the dumb and confused card again.

There's no need for it, though as Lea gets instantly annoyed and seems to forget that he should know the answer to that question. “With their mother, I would hope,” she spits, straightening up to go and put her mug in the dishwasher. “She called earlier, anyway.”

“Helena called?” He asks, his heart skipping a beat like every time they encountered a universe where Helena is still alive. Even now that she can't possibly be anywhere because it's Lea who slipped through her world to his, Blaine can't help but get excited hearing her talking about his long lost friend.

“No,” Lea frowns, glaring at him. “Michelle, of course. Blaine, what's wrong with you?”

Blaine realizes that he never thinks about mothers when talking about his kids. They have parents or fathers – him and Leo – an nothing else. Except for Helena. Timmy has a mother in his head, even if he never met her. In some way the twins don't, even if he loves Michelle very much. So, when Lea has said mother, he has instantly thought about the only one he considers as such.

“And what did she want?” He asks, clearing his throat and trying to act natural.

“To scream at me because I answered the phone, to begin with,” she makes a face. “I swear, she must be doing that on purpose. She knows I practically live here now. What does she expect, that I keep the phone ringing if you can't get it? Anyway, she wants you to know that she's calling her lawyer again and you will hear from her soon. Apparently, you're earning more than you were when the agreement was stipulated – no kidding! – so she wants more money for the kids. She seems to forget you're paying for their every need already, since she's still playing the bohemian artist!”

Now, that is more than Blaine was expecting. In his own version of the story, Leo and him suspended any contact with Michelle the day they brought the twins home. She was adamant about that and they agreed with her. But Lea speaks of alimony, which means he must have had the kids with Michelle. And that's weird. He wonders if they were married too, and what's Lea's place in all this.

“Did she really want more?” He asks, pretending to be upset. If anything, at least he can play the part of her Blaine to get information out of her.

“I know, right?” Lea shrugs in outrage. “Like, wasn't it enough that she took the house in the Hamptons and the Lexus out of the divorce? And mind you, she's still pissed that you got the custody. But, I mean, how could she even think you wouldn't? She can barely sustain herself, let alone two children. Gosh, I really wish your ex-wives were all like Helena. She's so cute and reasonable.”
Blaine can't stop his eyebrow from rising. How many ex-wives does he have, exactly? And again, where was Lea in all this? “And you didn't hear from her too, I suppose?” He asks confused.

“Actually, I did,” Lea nods. She walks around the kitchen counter and past him, so he sees that she's wearing something that couldn't be considered a skirt in any possible universe. It barely covers her ass, and since it's made of a flimsy fabric, every steps she takes, the skirt billows and he can see the curve of her ass. She doesn't seem to mind that at all, and when she bends to rummage into her bag on the couch, he is forced to look away. “She sent me a text saying that Timmy and her will be back from Boston next week. Speaking of which, I can take him to the Tricksters concert, if you're fine with it. I've always wanted to see them live, anyway.”

Blaine smiles because no matter the universe, Leo bonding with his elder son always warms his heart. “I don't mind at all,” he says, putting his mug away too. “He's old enough to go to a concert now, I guess.”

If the timing is the same as his universe, at least. “I'm happy to hear you say that,” Lea chuckles as she retrieves her phone probably to text Helena or Timmy back. “He'll be fifteen next month, it's about time you take him out of the cotton wool. After all, you thought I was old enough to do a lot of other things.”

Blaine is not surprised to know that part of their relationship isn't different here, because it never is. That's what being a constant of the universe means. Very little about them really changes in every universe. “That's another story. You weren't my daughter,” he says, hoping that it's true.

“But I was somebody else's and you didn't care either,” she replies with a chuckle. She puts the phone away and grabs the mail on the coffee table, giving it to him. “Oh! Here. The invitation to the annual actors and directors charity ball has arrived. It's all fancy and sort of handwritten, they like to do things old style. Can we go this time? I really, really want to.”

Blaine looks at the invitation for the ball, something he has never received in his life and that must be arrived with her. He's not even sure there is such a thing here in his universe, but the idea of telling her they are going and leaving his other self deal with the consequences of a withdrawing amuses him. “Of course we can, I bet you will be stunning in a dress,” he says, charmingly.

She beams at him and instantly throws her arms around his neck, leaving on his lips a little kiss which is both unexpected and pleasant at the same time. “What happened? This is not you. You never wanted to go before!” She says, happily.

Blaine chuckles. “I must not be myself then,” he jokes. “What are these other things?”

“Just bills,” she answers. “But I'm done being your assistant for free, you know? You should pay me. Hollywood assistants earn fortunes.”

She naturally slips on his lap. It's not so natural for him but there's not much he can do except for holding her by her slim hips. “But I'm not an Hollywood actor,” he says, trying his best not to feel her soft body against his own.

“That worked three years ago before the Golden Globe,” she says. “Now you are one.”

A Golden Globe and no Tonys? That's the worst universe ever. He would like to complain more, even forget what's happening for a bit and explain to her how disappointing this is, but she doesn't let him because her body fully pressing against his chest and her legs opening to straddle him are very distracting and upsetting in ways that she can't possibly understand right now.

“What are you doing?” He asks, hesitantly.

“Do you know,” she says, nosing her way up his neck to reach his ear to which she speaks in a whisper, “that this is the first time in weeks we're actually at home at the same time without one of your kids around?”

“And this is incredibly nice,” he stammers. She moves on his crotch and the skirt goes up, leaving her legs naked and Blaine with no place where to put his hands, “but it doesn't seem the right time.”

She bites at his earlobe and leaves little wet kisses along his jaw. “There is no better time than this. Nobody can interrupt us. We've all day, actually.”

Blaine has never felt that Leo was harassing him, even when he was being pushy. But this is probably different. It's not just the wrong Leo, at the wrong time, thinking that he is another Blaine. It is a woman, and despite having to deal with some pretty creepy versions of Leo in the past – he has met a Leo who was his son, after all – this is the one he can't stand because he doesn't like women. At all. “Alright, but this is not even the real problem,” he mumbles as she tries to kiss him properly. “Lea.... gosh, we need to talk.”

“Can we do that after?” She asks, with a naughty look in her eyes. “There's something I wanna do to you and it may involve my mouth.”

For the first time since he can remember, a hint like that makes him shiver in awkwardness. He gently pushes her away from himself and keeps her at distance. “No, we really need to talk now,” he says, seriously. “Or you may end regretting this, later.”

“Whoa, you do look serious,” she comments, rising an eyebrow.

“Because I am. I—Can you stand up, please?”

Lea sighs but she climbs off of him and straighten her skirt. She stands there tough, and doesn't look too happy. “So, what's so important that we can't have sex?”

This is a legit question coming from any version of Leo, after all. “Okay, listen. What I'm about to tell you is a little confusing and you probably won't believe me at first, but please let me tell you everything before thinking that I'm crazy, alright? Can you do that for me?”

Lea nods and grabs a chair. “Alright. What's happening?”

Blaine has explained this so many times to many different Blaines and Leos, but it always feels weird. “Are you familiar with the theory of the parallel universes?”

Lea looks at him as if she was about to burst out laughing, but she doesn't. “The theory that says that there are thousands of millions of other universes similar to our own in which copies of ourselves live other lives?”

“Exactly,” Blaine nods. “I can tell you for sure that it's not just a theory and that all those universes exist and have the irritating tendency to collide whenever something somewhere goes wrong. Now, I know that I look and sound and feel like it, but I'm not the Blaine you are with.”


Blaine sighs. “I am Blaine Anderson and we are together, but in my universe – which I'm actually pretty sure is this one – I don't have any ex-wives. Helena died giving birth to Timothy and Michelle was the surrogate mother we chose together because we wanted a child. But most importantly, here you're a guy.”

“What?” Lea asks again, in a high-pitched voice. “Blaine, what are you talking about? Are you drunk or something?”

“No, I'm not—please, let me finish, okay?” He insists. “I know this is upsetting and extremely confusing, I've seen it happen before. Many times. Just let me explain.”

The look in Lea's eyes is the same confused and angry look he's seen in all the Leos he has met. She wants to scream at him and be mad at him, but there's a little part of her, a voice inside her head, that urges her to listen because deep inside she knows he's telling the truth. Blaine knows how it works because that's exactly what happened to him when the other Leo came to him for the first time. Lea nods quickly, inviting him to go on.

“Thanks,” he says with a little smile. “A few years ago, my husband – which means you – came home and he looked and sounded slightly off. I sensed that something was wrong, but I still thought he was him. He was not. He told me that for some reason two universes where my Leo and him were very similar had collided, and now he was there with him and my Leo was in his place. I didn't believe him, obviously, before I really started to notice that he acted slightly differently from the Leo I knew and that he really didn't know facts that he should have known. There were two possible explanation, either he was making fun of me, or he really was who he said he was. Later I came to understand that we – me and you, whatever version of us – are a universal constant, essential for the universe's well being; which means we must be together in all the universes, in order for the fabric of space and time to stay whole. If something happens and we are not together, this fabric starts to deteriorate and the universes start crashing against each other.”

Lea has been listening very closely but she looks doubtful. “It sounds like the plot of one of your movies. A very good one, actually. You should think about writing it down or something.”

“Unfortunately, this is not a movie. Every second we spend talking, the risk of the universes collapsing increases. We need to find a way to send you back.”

Lea frowns. “Wait, why me? What if this is my universe and you're the one who's been traveling?"

“I am not,” Blaine shakes his head. “This is my home. Everything here is exactly as it should be. Except you.”

Lea seems upset. Blaine recognizes in her that moment when an other-self realizes that something is really wrong and starts feeling scared. “Nope. If what you say it's true, and I'm not saying that it is, this is my home too. It looks like it.”

“But it's not. Look around Lea,” he says, showing her the place. “Look closely, there must be something that looks right but it's not. Usually, if we have the same house, there's a little detail that gives it away. And If there isn't, then look at the photos. You aren't in any of them.”

She actually seems to notice that this place is not exactly how she's used to see it. When she lays eyes on the row of frames on a shelf to her right, she lets out a little surprised scream. “Is this...?” She picks up one frame. The photo in it is one of the many of Leo Blaine has taken during the years.

“Yes, that's you here. Can you see the similarity?”

“He looks exactly like me,” she breathes out, shocked. She looks at each and every photo. She sees that Leo is everywhere, with Blaine, with Timmy and the twins. “But if I'm here, where is he?”

“With your Blaine,” Blaine says. “Is he a reasonable person?”

Lea shrugs. “I think so, but he won't be happy that I turned into a guy.”

“I thought as much. He has two ex-wives after all,” Blaine chuckles.

Lea is still confused and the only thing she seems able to do is sit down and look like she's gonna throw up or something, so Blaine decides he can give her some time and talk about her world to help her focus. Maybe this could even help the reverse process. “How did it work between you two?” He asks. “You said you were fifteen when you met him, so when did he get married... twice?”

She takes a deep breath and starts to explain. She looks nervous at first, but speaking of things she knows calms her down a little. “He is an old friend of my father and he came to my school to give a drama class. I went to it and we had the chance to spend a lot more time together after school for rehearsals and everything. By then, he had already divorced from Helena. We fell in love and got together the summer of that same year, but since I was underage, we kept it a secret until I was eighteen. My fathers freaked out a little because of the age difference but I was legally an adult and they've never known we had been seeing each other before, so they accepted it eventually. But Blaine thought I was too young to be with him in a serious relationship and I agreed with him. I wanted to make my own experiences, I wanted to travel the world with my friends and be with people my own age. I think I wanted to see if I loved him for real or just because he was older and he made me feel special. So we decided that we would take some time apart. Actually, we never really managed that completely because we would have sex every time we met and we were alone, but nothing more than that. We've been some kind of strange friends with benefits thing for a very long time. Then, five years ago he met Michelle and he was happy with her, so we stopped seeing each other for good. I started dating my best friend, so the whole thing wasn't so dramatic. When we met again three years later, his marriage with Michelle was over and he had two kids, and my relationship with Adam hadn't worked out, so we just fell for each other again. Everything fell into place, actually. It was as if we had just seen each other the day before. We've been together ever since.”

Blaine is smiling with a mixture of affection and sadness. This version of them has had the story he wanted for Leo and himself. Lea has done exactly what he had asked Leo and he always refused to do. Now he has proof that they could have been alright like this too. It's easy to think that without talking to the other Blaine and asking him what was in his mind at the time, if he really wanted Lea to be free of have her experience or if he just didn't want to get involved with her too much. He deliberately decides not to dwell on this kind of thoughts.

“So, are you planning on marrying?”

Lea laughs. “Oh God no!” She exclaims. “He'd love to but I know that would be a train wreck. Blaine's the perfect boyfriend but a terrible husband. Marriage makes him anxious and he doesn't work well under pressure. We're good as we are now. Are you two married?”

Blaine nods. “Yes, we are. He didn't want to, but I insisted so much that he said yes to make me stop asking,” he chuckles. “You are very different from him under many different key characteristics.”

“Same goes for you and my Blaine,” she says, and then she rolls her eyes with a chuckle. “It still feels strange to say that.”

Blaine smiles back. “I know.”

“So,” Lea sighs, apparently embracing the explanation. “Is there a way to fix this? I mean, if I came here, there must be a way to go back right?”

Blaine doesn't miss the anxious tone in her question. “Yes, but we have to find out how you arrived here, where's the hole in the fabric, and bring my Leo on the same exact spot on the other side. I need you to tell me everything you did this morning.”

“I didn't do anything special,” she muses.

“It doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be something special at all,” Blaine explains. “Usually, it has something to do with mirrors. They seem to be perfect places of passage.”

Lea thinks about it. “Well, I've looked at myself in the mirror, but...”

“Where? Here?” He asks, already moving toward the bathroom. Lea nods and follows him there. Blaine checks the big mirror above the sink and touches it to feel if it's still there. It's not like whatever let you go through usually melts into water-like substances as you see in the movies, but it's worth a try. “Do you have something to write on this?”

“What? Wait...” Leah disappears in the other room and comes back with a lipstick. “Here.”

Blaine takes the lipstick and sighs, wanting his boy back as soon as possible. The first time Leo crossed universes, it was through a mirror in his parents' house. Unlike Alice, he didn't go to Wonderland, and bringing him was not easy at all. But they learned one thing, that the two universes were connected and they could talk to each other by writing on the objects, provided that they were in the same space in both realities. After the second and third time they had to deal with stuff like this, they decided that the first thing to do while being trapped in some place was find out where you came from and write on it, so that the person on the other side could see it and work with you to take you out. So, Blaine writes Leo's name right in the middle of the mirror and waits for an answer.

Lea holds her breath next to him, looking at the mirror for something to happen, but nothing changes. “Is it working?” She asks after a while.

“No. Is there a mirror just like this in your Blaine's house?” Blaine asks, and when she confirms that the house is indeed identical to this one except for the photo, he growls. “Shit.”

“What?” She says alarmed.

Blaine breathes in and out, trying to calm down if not for her, for himself. Panicking doesn't help anyone think straight. “Maybe he's not in the house,” he says. “But that could be a problem because if he didn't appear right in the house--”

“My Blaine might have not let him in because he's a guy.”

Blaine nods, scratching his nape. He covers his face with his hands for a moment and tries to think. The very first time he did almost nothing to change things back as they were, the whole issue being in the hands of the two Leos. And after that, they had a glimpse of a great number of universes, but that kid Pete was there to help them. He feels a little lost, here.

“Does it have to be a real mirror?” Lea asks, suddenly.

“What?” He asks, looking up.

“Does it have to be a real mirror or any reflective surface does the trick?” She asks, waiting for the answer as if from that depended her life, which it's true in the end. Sudden realization dawns in Blaine's eyes.

“No,” he shakes his head. “It can be anything, actually. It just needs to reflect images.”

“Then I dusted the TV screen this morning,” she says. “That thing is so huge it can reflect almost the whole room if it's clean.”

Blaine smiles so brightly that he's almost comical. “You're awesome,” he says, grabbing her head and kissing her on her lips, without thinking. She stands there a little shocked as he runs in the living room. On the big TV screen that hangs on the wall his name shines bright red, written in marker. And under it, the question: “Where the fuck are you?”

He laughs as Lea joins him. “What's so funny?”
“Your alternative self,” he answers. “Give me the lipstick, please.”

He's still laughing when he writes: “Right here. Thought it was the bathroom mirror. Is everything okay?”

Leo's answer doesn't take long to arrive, which means he must be right there. “Yes, but hurry up because you're pretty freaked out here.”

“It doesn't surprise me. You're a girl there.”

“I so wanna hear about that,” Leo writes. Blaine can imagine is face right now. Leo's always very excited to know about their many alternative selves. “Make me stand right in front of this thing. Step away.”

Blaine turns to look at Lea. “Now you need to stand in front of the TV screen as you did this morning when you were dusting it. We think that recreating the exact conditions of the passage will reverse the process. On the other side, Leo will do the same. Hopefully, your two selves will lock to each other and you will switch to your rightful place as the universe of origin always calls its elements back to itself.”
Lea nods, confused. She understands half of what he says but he's Blaine and she trusts him. And she trusts her male self too. She opens her arms, smiling. “Can I have a hug?” She says.

“Of course.” Blaine smiles back and hugs her closely, leaving a tender kiss on her head. “Be a good girl.”

“I always am,” she chuckles. Then she stands right in front of the TV, trying to remember where she was that morning. Since she didn't notice the her going through the passage, she can't know when it happens and what she was doing exactly. So, she starts doing everything she had done. Nothing changes, but when she turns to ask the other Blaine what to do, he's not there anymore.

Leo turns around and finds himself staring at his very own Blaine. He would recognize him anywhere in the universe, even if he hadn't that sparkle in his eyes that says he recognizes him back. The next thing he knows is Blaine hugging him like there's no tomorrow. “You're back!” The man says.

“I'm back,” Leo whispers against his neck, leaving a kiss there. He sniffs, smelling something sweet and vaguely fruity. He backs off, looking outraged. “Is this her scent? Did you fuck her?”

“No!” Blaine cries out, equally outraged. “I just hugged her! Geez, Leo, she was a girl!”

“Well, she was still me!” He protests. Some very weird part of him feels a little offended that Blaine didn't want to fuck her just because she was a girl, even if he really didn't want Blaine to have sex with her. It's a complicated feeling when you are both jealous and offended by your boyfriend's refusal to cheat on you with another version of yourself.

“Yes, and she had boobs,” Blaine protests, shocked by Leo's pretenses. “And I don't do boobs.”

“But they were my boobs!” Leo insists, forgetting for a moment how crazy this is. “Did you touch them? How did they feel?”

Blaine frowns badly at him. “No! I didn't touch them!” He freaks out. “And for God's sake just stop this nonsense. I don't even understand if you wanted me to be with her or not!”

“I don't know,” Leo answers thoughtfully, as if it was a serious question. “It's complicated. Anyway, it has been the worst two days of my life.”

“What? You've only been away a couple of hours.”

Leo sighs. “Different realities, sometimes even different time. Blaine, how many times will I have to tell you this?” He sighs. “Anyway, we really need to find those two of us that keep screwing things up. Really, what's wrong with them? Each and everyone of us learned our lesson already, why can't they? I swear that once we find them, I'm gonna chain them together!”

Blaine sighs. “You know, that wouldn't be enough. They need to love each other to make it work.”

“But that's not even the problem!” Leo protests. “We always love each other, no matter where we are or who we are! That's the point with us.”

Blaine drags him into his arms and hugs him tenderly. He can't help but smile stupidly against Leo's neck and cuddle him a little. And when Leo predictably calls his name, confused by the hug, Blaine doesn't answer. There's no better Leo than his, especially when he says the most precious things without even noticing.

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